a response to irritation is absurdity

some preliminaries

it was many years ago that i drew the conclusion for myself that it is possible to accept two and probably more completely divergent and contrary view points at virtually the same time.after all if ideas and society are dominated by the ideas of the dominant group which are theslves divergent,competitive,contradictions and function as ideology why should the experience not be possible anbd probable for the individual.in an irrational society lots if its features will be irrational.

in our small family,in our discussion and banter which are usually inesperable,we play a number of word games or running word play.amongst these i have become aware that my children,2 adolescent daughters,they sometimes wait for me to say something absurd and the quote me on their websites/facebook pages.on one occassion they quoted an old fashioned reference to the british liberal,now liberal democrat party which describes them as "tories with velvet toe-caps"

i talk sometimes here about personal and otherwise private experience not out of ego or self advetisement but because of a two fold view about knowledge.one is that now we live in a time when reality is itself plural,divided and contestable it is also relativist.a partial answer to that is personal experience as a starting point.i also learned from a not particularly marxist element in my political education that away from and outside the "advantages"and resources of academe,is to make the self and the selfs immediate environment working outwards as a legitimate focus of and starting point of research.

irritable concern

in the evening of 26/03/2011 my eldest daughter and wife returned seperately from the cuts camapgn demonstration.i became increasingly concerned for my daughter aware of the changing tone of events in the evening and of police tactics.

when she got home i expressed my irritation and concern intentionally in an absurd way.i like to hope it makes the point with humour and without confrontation.

late into the night and into a new morning

during the night i woke several times out of dreams and hearing fragments of "the news".i found myself constructing a collage or patchwork of thoughts out of those phenomena combined with my own responses,oscillating between despair,distress,tears,rage and ecstasy.

it was also the night the in britain clocks move and hour area into bst/british summers time which has been called and is elsewhere daylight saving time.

they are stealing our time.when the aqltest calendar wasa introuced in england there was a "difference"of eleven days.which resulted in social disorder demanding the return of the missing days,which for some might have eternal consequnceds for our souls.so i want my hour back which they have stolen.

it is nothing to do with british.it is very unbritish.we dont have summer in this country-or cliamte,just weather and often all of itws variety in the same day.if it saves time it take sit from us.

-to be cdontinued-

lost
28/03/2011

i apologise that my last/previous post was foreshortened by technical problems.

..when i awoke properly i realised i ahd dreamed numerous fragments of real events,chopped and mangled like life and/or class society acts on me(us?)every day.

whilst ir recgise that some of my rage might seem unreasonable there is no denying the rage itself,that feels so let down by the system and those that rule over us,that i feel it not to be unreasonable to be unreassonable.to hell with compromises.

there has been some shock and horror and distancing in relation to those who occupied stores and trashed banks,though the 2 are not likely to have ythe same roots.
it seems to me that just as film allows us to vent some of our fantasies safely,like revenge fantasies the destruction wrought by others on this occassion also relieves and dissipates our rage.that is both positive and negative.part of the story is also i suspect that many do not admit to that level of rage as it is socially proscrfibed and in freudian terms repressed.there is also a leverl at which the destruction is symbolic.it is interesting that the sites chosen did not seem to be peopled or staffed,and i would guess that most participants know they will not impact directly to bring the system down.

a lon time ago the berrigan brothers were tried and i belive jailed for burning draft cards.later possibly both and certainly philip was tried and jailed for cracking open the lid of a nuclear missile silo and puring his own blood on it.i dont doubt they were subject to horrendous abuse amongst other things but i doubt if they were called thugs and even criminals in the way the "black block" and the anarchists have been described.

we,and indeed i do not need to agree with their views or their actions to have some respect for it.they have their own logic,it is not reducible to being senseless-for everything has a sense even if distorted,incomplete,distorted,illinformed.i assume nothing,except that these people,these ideas,these actions are understandable and probably defendable.they have aright to be defended in courts under the current system and should have a hearing,a defence within any new order.i do not assume an outcome,in the latter situation in either direction.

i will be exploring what defence contigencies are now in place and in their absence will seek to contribute my skills and experience allthough these are small.i would welcome hearing from anyone in the uk or indeed elsewhere who has ideas,experience or skills for such a project,via these posts or private messages.

lost,
28/03/2011